Friday, August 31, 2012

{Faces} a Five Sentence Fiction Prompt

Lillie McFerrin


Staring down at the ground to avoid eye contact, she walked quickly down the main street.

Her cheeks burned as she felt their stares follow her.

Feeling their empathy for her, flowing from them in waves, she kept her face downturned eyes following the cracks in the pavement below her.

A shadow fell across her path, she found herself looking up into the face of the local gossip.

"It's been a while since we last saw you Florence, they tell me your girls not been well"


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Linking up with Lillie McFerrin this week. I'm happier with this one ;)


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

8 comments:

LittleWhiteDove said...

I think it is testament to your writing skills that now I feel all uncomfortable and wanting to hide...

Lillie McFerrin said...

You've packed these sentences full of emotion!! Really well done :)

Sandra Crook said...

Seems like there's a world of heartbreak behind her demeanour. Nicely done.

mjshorts said...

An intriguing tale in just five sentences. Left me full of questions and wanting to know more.

injaynesworld said...

She seems ashamed or embarrassed of something. Or is it grief? She feels "empathy" from those watching her, rather than condemnation though. Like mjshorts, I'm intrigued and full of questions.

Kern Windwraith said...

I kind of want to kick the town gossip in the shins right about now. A painful snapshot of your character's shame and distress. Well done.

Lisa Shambrook said...

A snapshot of pain...very intense and personal. Lovely writing.

Sarah said...

I felt uncomfortable reading it too, I wanted her to hurry or hide but Im not sure why. Empathy suggests understanding and concern but clearly the fact that she was the centre of attraction was adding to her distress.