Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Seven in Seventeen...

Or can I make it Seventeen?

Why the seven you ask? Seven is the number of days in a single week. Seven is also the number of posts I have managed to write in nearly 365 days.

Don't ask me why. All I know is I keep returning with a firm "welcome back - did ya miss me" kind of post and then I stall. Perhaps I am afraid of the blank page. Perhaps my energy feels too much for little corner of the internet. Or maybe I am just lazy.

Whatever the reasoning - this year has been huge. 2017 has been really good to us and not so good. Yet I sit here in December gazing back and wondering what the heck we have been doing.

I began the year with stars in my eyes and overwhelm in my heart. As I have done the previous two years I filled out my Leonie Dawson Shining Goals workbook from start to finish and then I quietly began freaking out. The goals were huge and so many that I could barely breathe - let alone remember each one for each different section. By the third week of January my planners (yes multiple) were heaving and my anxiety was rising.

By the end of the first term I was an exhausted wreck. I blamed the FOUR early morning before School activities each week and proceeded to quit all but one of these. I was more than just tired, I was a walking wreck - it didn't help that headaches invaded my life and in reality experiencing back to back and week long headaches probably didn't help with the fatigue. Cue multiple doctors appointments, tests, negative results and possible suggestions all with zero outcome. Evertying peaked mid year when my ovaries tried to do me in. Seriously death by ovary is no mean feat. That one involved multiple Doctors, Ambulance, Scans, Specialists and a possible result (meaning by the time I was well enough & could get an appointment for scans, it was too late to see anything but my "very healthy" ovaries.) Miracle of miracles my headaches eased after that bout so I am presuming it was all linked to hormones... but truly is it any wonder my anxiety levels peaked? Remember how much I hate Doctors?

Oh and between all that we renovated (practically) the entire house.

Amazing how I can pack an entire year in one medium sized paragraph. Yet there was so much more happening behind the scenes. For all the stress and the dust and the killer ovaries I am by far the most calmest I have been in a long while. So while on the surface 2017 appeared to be huge and stressful and busy - it was also one of the best years we have experienced in some time. Although I am looking forward to a less dusty 2018, but with the bathrooms still to go I know I need to hold that dream a little longer.


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