Friday, June 8, 2012

Now I dance…

Once upon a time I was carefree and a little rain wouldn't bother me. During torrential downpours I'd run to the car barefoot and giggling because I was drenched and (not so surprisingly) the umbrella was usually in the boot or at home on the garage floor - you know the very best places to store brollies!  

Nowadays I seem to be all about the "get out of the rain, you'll catch a cold" AND "no you cannot walk to swimming when it's raining, you'll get wet" (well duh' of course she's gonna get wet at swimming) I guess 5 years of nursing colds and flus and becoming a mum sort of deleted my 'fun' valve.

When I see a puddle… THIS is what I do… 

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THIS is what I'd much rather be doing…………….! 

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There comes a time in life when we all need to grow up and act our age, but that doesn't mean we should suppress the child within.   

Yesterday I received a package in the mail, I knew it was coming and I had been waiting with anticipation of it's imminent arrival. Much like a kid in a candy store type anticipation. Last year I had the chance to finally meet a few of my beautiful online buddies, one I'd been chatting to for years and it was like we'd known each other forever the amount of chatting we squeezed into one weekend away (well she chatted… I dutifully listened, it's what I do best ;) together the four of us we talked and dreamed, sewed and drank coffee, laughed until the wee hours while some tried to sleep. 

Anyway my point, which I'm sort of missing in my usual long winded way is that I have long admired one particular girl, not in a girly, girly way (though she did perhaps show a little more than was expected on camp ;) but hey what happens AT camp stays AT camp ;) No this admiration for her is more the inspirational variety - I could use many words to describe this girl "Amazing. Exceptional. A legend in her lifetime. My world would be cold and empty without her" but those words {note: total & utter use of plagiarised words from the woman herself} they don't really sum up how inspiring, caring and brilliant she really is. I know for one my life wouldn't be as funny without her in it because she TOTALLY gets all my silly jokes and TOTALLY gets when I want to press "like" on my own status updates over on Facebook. Only a really good friend will understand that level of CRAZY!  

And you know, I like to think that I inspire her too. If it wasn't for me her (once neglected) blog would be languishing in the deep dark depths of blogland, covered in dust bunnies! The way I see it, if it wasn't for me, facebooking K at camp who was sitting beside R, to tell her to hurry up and blog something I'd have had nothing to read these past few months (though I do partly blame her for now blogging far too much and having my bloglines spiral out of control with un-read posts… 700+ unread isn't bad right?!?) 

I also like to think, if it wasn't for me - she wouldn't be able to call herself a mighty talented artist / painter today! 

My parcel yesterday (finally I get to the point ;) was an LWD original painting. I may have sort of hassled her about painting me an original oil painting (ok truth be told, I only mentioned it once… or twice) and really between you & me, she needed that jumping point - something to challenge her and let her jump in with both feet because she is so talented, she tries to squash those rumours, but I'm telling you here and now - they are all TRUE. This girl is one talented lady and I have much to learn from her… which could be a bit funny because I sort of maybe broke my craft ban to buy myself some oil paints (ok they were a cheap packet) but still… the big difference being - I CAN'T DRAW!!!

Laughs aside, my new painting is everything about where I am right now - this journey I've been on. It's the culmination of a years worth of therapy and realising once again that I can be what I want to be, perhaps there are things in life that will always remain out of my reach, but I have the opportunity to rise above and to realise some of my lost dreams. I lost myself somewhere along this journey and the last year has been about finding Me, finding my joy and learning to live with the pain. And I can live with it. I have risen above it and I accept now the things that didn't happen for whatever reason. I've been so busy focussing on the damned rainbow that I didn't see that I could embrace that inner child - the one that wants to jump from the slippery slide into great big puddles, that inner child who once danced in the rain. And she WILL dance once more.  

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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about dancing in the rain 


Original Oil Painting "Dance" By Little White Dove. Her words (far better than mine) can be found here


LittleWhiteDove said...

You. YOU. I laughed, and I cried. You DO inspire me, in lots of ways. I'm so glad you love your painting,and I am truly touched that I seem to have fooled you into thinking I have kind of talent ;)


~*PaKaHaJa*~ said...

Beautiful - and I completely agree with you on EVERY word about Mrs M.. She is amazing and one of a kind.. xoxo