Tuesday, July 24, 2012

{Gutted} Visual Dare #14

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Was it only a week ago? 
Lying here together, contemplating their future. An endless future of happiness in this home they had built together. 
Only five days living a simple life. Now everything was wrong. 
Tears coursed down her cheeks as she mourned. Memories lost. Dreams broken. Closing her eyes, her vision consumed once more with frightening images. Red and Orange flashes. Shrouded by hazy grey smoke. Surreal images.   
The desolation surrounding her did not lie. Her aching heart and soul matched the pain of her body.
An image appeared in the brightly lit doorway. Silhouetted by the blazing sun.
Returned to her as he'd promised a week earlier. Inching forward and embracing the light her pain eased.
Her soul was filled. Two Hearts become one. 

Linking up with Anonymous Legacy for the first time this week. Miss Dove and I are challenging each other to even greater heights of creativity this week! I've attempted a flash fiction (100 words) this one finished at 127! I'm thinking that even though I could have incorporated this prompt into my current WIP; flash fiction is better for me as I need to learn to restrict my word count.
Constructive Criticism is most welcome! 
{ETA - I'm having major issues with line spacing due to a new blog editing program, hence the weird spacing!}


LittleWhiteDove said...

Love it Car! I love how you and I have similar imagery for the final scene, with very different endings :)

Angela said...

Well done! I like how you've layered in a lot of narrative texture - implied storylines, unanswered questions - in so short a space. Love too the juxtaposed ending -- that as her home is gutted, her soul is made whole by the one she loves. Great work! So glad you participated in the Visual Dare! Hope to see you do it again. :-)