Wednesday, August 1, 2018

Rock bottom means you can go UP!

Life is an ever changing beast.

Maybe it's an age thing catching up with me. Or perhaps as we get older our responsibilities grow and evolve.

I thought last year was crazy with back to back renovations and general upheaval.

This year... this year takes the cake and eats it too.

In years gone by, I will see friends post their life dramas on Facebook. One thing after another of ridiculous life events affecting them. I sit back thinking "Oh poor them. That truly sucks. Glad it's not me" (the last bit under my breath lest I unbalance the powers that be for it all to come crashing on us.) Yet it does. The inevitable crash.

The difference?

I suppose I don't air my drama on social media platforms. I speak to a select few when my old friend anxiety pulls up a pew. I used to spew out all my troubles on this platform yet it has become eerily quiet as I turn into myself and my troubles tumble across the pages of my many journals.

I am thankful though... each day my memories on Facebook are glorious filled with dogs or child. No dramas to be seen here. Except for that time I ran out of coffee... or when the coffee machine broke!

This year though. The dramas they are revolving around me and the past fortnight I... how do I say this - I lost my shit. Rock bottom hurts. I became so embroiled in all that was going wrong or being difficult in life that I lost sight of the pure beauty that is life and it's ever changing hum as I put one foot forward.

This past week I have spent time daily planning, dreaming and considering all the things I should be doing to keep my self on an even keel. It has been eye opening.

Ten things I have learnt!

1. If I let myself become overwhelmed, anxiety creeps in and takes control.
2. When I write down the overwhelm, I am able to think clearly
3. Walking with upbeat music and burning muscles helps me calm down
4. Talking with my husband and daughter helps them understand ME better
5. Taking the time to stop and be in the moment is magical (yesterday I saw 2 lorikeets on a tree branch and dolphins frolicking).
6. Planning is my best friend
7. Morning Pages {modified} are medicine to my brain.
8. A daily art date is IMPERATIVE
9. When I allow myself to dream big, I feel ALIVE
10. Living slower is actually getting MORE achieved

It has been a HUGE week of revelations for me.